This was the very first commission I did for sol-niger (in my most recent opening of my services). The only reason I havn’t actually posted it before was lack of a good quality photo/scan (don’t have an a3 scanner). I was mainly upset as I was very clinical to my approach to this piece and I feel that preciseness didn’t feel very apparent with the pictures I do have of it.
I will admit I was incredibly timid when working on this piece as this was the first time doing a commission after actually considering myself to be an artist of any value. I wanted that to show in my work, but at the same time, I didn’t want to miss represent the point of how I felt about the subject at hand. So with a mixture of self doubt, lacking courage , and fear of creating the wrong image, I think I perhaps held back and became maybe a little too clean cut with the entire creative process, but all the same I think the unnatural circumstances made me create something even more personal (I feel that way anyway). In so I became very close to this picture as my thought process lifted me to another level of acceptance of myself, the way in which I think while creating an illustration, and trying to incorporate feelings into something that was not born of my own imagination.
This was/is probably one of the more difficult pictures I have ever done, even if it does not show in physical complexity.